Quarreled with my mum again. Over the past 8 months ever since I graduated, it's always about the same thing.
She wants me to get a job with prestige and high pay, with relation to my degree. I want to chase my dreams of doing marine biology-related stuff and perhaps dancing.
She thinks I have NO AMBITION, and that i'm too frivolous. That I'm so well-provided for that I can afford to 'laze' around and not find a 'proper' job. She's disappointed and embarrassed when her other christian friends tells her that their kids are doing so well - lawyers, doctors..etc, and all she has to say about me is that I'm jobless. She doesn't see the point of what I'm doing. I'm freakin' holding 4 part time jobs and she dismisses that.
She thinks money is everything. She's grieved because she has a daughter who doesn't have any high ambitions in life to earn big bucks. She thinks I'm wasting their time and money by taking up a degree that I'm not planning to use.
I'm SO FREAKIN' SICK AND TIRED. AND SAD TOO. Yeah. FEELS SO GOOD that my mum - someone whose opinions mean SO MUCH to me - thinks that I'm a good for nothing.
When I tell her how much I wanna serve, she tells me serving is meant for after you find a proper job, and if you have time, THEN you can serve. HUH.
GOD... u mean everything to me and I wanna use my life for Your purposes. I'm not gonna put you second place to anything. But I need to know what You have planned for me. I'm taking a particular route now, but I need your confirmation that I'm heading the right way, despite the frustration and pain that my mum brings to my heart all the time.
She wants me to get a job with prestige and high pay, with relation to my degree. I want to chase my dreams of doing marine biology-related stuff and perhaps dancing.
She thinks I have NO AMBITION, and that i'm too frivolous. That I'm so well-provided for that I can afford to 'laze' around and not find a 'proper' job. She's disappointed and embarrassed when her other christian friends tells her that their kids are doing so well - lawyers, doctors..etc, and all she has to say about me is that I'm jobless. She doesn't see the point of what I'm doing. I'm freakin' holding 4 part time jobs and she dismisses that.
She thinks money is everything. She's grieved because she has a daughter who doesn't have any high ambitions in life to earn big bucks. She thinks I'm wasting their time and money by taking up a degree that I'm not planning to use.
I'm SO FREAKIN' SICK AND TIRED. AND SAD TOO. Yeah. FEELS SO GOOD that my mum - someone whose opinions mean SO MUCH to me - thinks that I'm a good for nothing.
When I tell her how much I wanna serve, she tells me serving is meant for after you find a proper job, and if you have time, THEN you can serve. HUH.
GOD... u mean everything to me and I wanna use my life for Your purposes. I'm not gonna put you second place to anything. But I need to know what You have planned for me. I'm taking a particular route now, but I need your confirmation that I'm heading the right way, despite the frustration and pain that my mum brings to my heart all the time.
3 Comments:
i understand, gal.. the enemy can also use the pple closest 2 us 2 bring us down.. but we hv a mighty God ya? He has called and He'll bring us thru..
Praying with u, babe...
Bummers unite! :p
Hang in there babe! Keep praying about it and God will show you the way. But be nice to your mummy! She IS your mummy after all! Be good! =)
yeah that's true... and God's showing himself faithful guys! I'm so glad! Will update my blog to let u know what happened.
gonna-be-ex-bummer... ~sad~
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